Some of my favourite song lyrics...

It's two a.m.,
The fear has gone
I'm sittin' here waitin',
The gun still warm
   -Golden Earring

Cast out from the jungle
With no rations or canteen
For selling faulty rifles
To the thieves in Tanzania
   -Red Rider

Outside the street's on fire in a real death waltz
Between what's flesh and what's fantasy
And the poets down here don't write nothing at all
They just stand back and let it all be
   -Bruce Springsteen

And who can forget...

Wango, wango,
Tango, tango,
Wango, wango, wango, wango
Tango, tango, tango, tango
yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah!
   -Ted Nugent


What are some of your favourite song lyrics?

I can not has Internet now?

As a quick follow-up to my previous - non-photographic - Internet cat post; my wife came home from work to find out she could not access the World Wide Web from her laptop for some unknown reason. After a significant amount of generally ineffectual troubleshooting, we discovered the laptop's internal wi-fi card had been turned off. Apparently, in getting comfortable on the keyboard earlier in the day, Kitteh had managed to simultaneously press the shift key, and the F-whatever key that has the little picture of an antenna on it.

Do you think she's trying to tell us something?

Trimming the tree

Tonight we set up the Christmas tree, and discovered that the lighted snowflake we've had as a topper for the last several years doesn't light up any more. Pat commented that trying to figure out which little mini light bulb was burned out was more trouble than it was worth, and we should just buy a new tree topper. Which statement immediately brought to mind this post from the original AWV, originally published in December of 2007:

We put up the Christmas tree today. As the wife was trimming it, she mentioned that we needed to get a new angel to put on top. As I recall, the conversation went something like this...

Paul: Can we get one that shoots lasers out of her eyes?
Paul's wife: Lasers? That wouldn't be very angelic.
Paul: Can we get one riding a shark?
Paul's wife: Get serious.
Paul: I am serious. I think an angel riding a shark with lasers shooting out of her eyes would be all kinds of awesome.

Let's play a game

Apparently, this blog is the first result in a Google search for the phrase, "npr penguin poem mary poppins asks do you like kids and the penguin says yes in a red wine sauce."

Ima let that sink in for a little bit. According to my stat package, someone actually visited AWV from a Google results page for that combination of words. I cannot image why someone would Google that combination of words. That's where you come in.

Please feel free to speculate in the comments what you think the person who typed in that search criteria was really looking for.

Monday Stealing

I ripped this off from Kelly, who, apparently, ripped it off from somewhere else (as it was meant to be ripped). I'm not a big quiz kinda guy, but this one fed right into my own personal sense of misanthropy and self-superiority. You probably shouldn't read it.

1. Lindsay Lohan was recently sentenced to 90 days in jail. What do you think her future has in store for her?

Who cares?


2. What is the biggest fashion "don't" that you would like to police?

Who cares?


3. How should we punish sites that lure us in with "read this" and take us somewhere where we are first greeted by a pop-up and then a series of click throughs to actually read the meat of the story?

Be smart enough to not click on the lure link in the first place. I mean, c'mon, they're pretty damn easy to spot, you know. Also, who cares?


4. What is the most you will do to post a comment on a site? At what point is it not worth posting a comment?

I usually balk at signing up for some proprietary commenting system that isn't widely used. I mean, I have a Blogger (Google) ID, an AOL ID, a Wordpress ID, a Yahoo! ID and a Typekey ID. If your blog uses some other sign-up required system that I've never even heard of before, I'm unlikely to make the effort, 'cause, you know, who cares? Unless, of course, I need to point out how stupid you are, or something.


5. If you purchase something online and you are charged for postage, is it still reasonable to charge for "shipping and handling"? What exactly does "shipping and handling" entail?

"Shipping and handling" is just another scam way of inflating the profit on your sale. I just add it to the purchase price in my head and then decide if I think it's still a good deal. Ebay users who charge it deserve to be shot. And, to carry on the theme, "who cares!"

That's all.

Concerning Debcons, and The Great Tim Tam Heresy

My friends, my dear, dear friends, we have been led astray. The path we have been following faithfully, it turns out, is but a maze of deception. We have been led astray.

Let me explain.

It was the best of times, it was the worst of times. It was about seven o'clock on a Saturday night. Most of us had arrived at Lai Toh Heen restaurant near Mount Pleasant and Eglinton for our "Taste of Kitai" dinner and Debcon Bright Weavings Get Together. Things were going about as usual. Guy was buying drinks (thank you, Sir); people were renewing old accquaintances, and making new ones; we were all admiring Niel's authentic first off the press editions of Lord of Emperors, Ysabel, and Under Heaven; I was calling Paula on my cell phone... As is also usual at these gatherings, new people were fitting in like old friends. At one point, I wandered over to the other table to see how things were going. Loni was there. Our eyes met. There was a sudden hush around the table - almost a stillness in the room. And then, she said those three little words: "I brought Tim-tams."

For a moment, I didn't say anything. Then, as is my wont, I tried to make light of the situation. "Where," I said, "are we going to find hot chocolate?"

It was Loni's turn to spend a moment in silence. The look of confusion on her face alarmed me. "What," she finally managed, "what ever would you want with hot chocolate?"

I looked around furtively. There were several of the uninitiated in the room. I leaned in close. I whispered, "you know, for the...slams."

She laughed. Not with malice, but with affection. She patted my hand reassuringly, much as one would pat the hand of a young child who had just announced that he doubted the existence of Santa Claus, or the Easter Bunny... or Jesus. "Silly boy," she said. "You do Tim-tam slams with coffee, not hot chocolate."

The room spun. I struggled to maintain my footing on a floor threatening to fall out from under me. "But, but, Thunderchi-, Terry... he said-"

Someone else spoke then. In my condition I could not even tell who, but the words shall be burned indelibly on my soul from this time until eternity: "Paul, Terry didn't drink coffee." At last the heresy was revealed. Terry, Thunderchild, he who preceeded us all, had taught us an alternative Tim-tam slam. He had modified the traditional ritual in order to suit his own, personal tastes and preferences. Our slamming had never been authentic. From the very beginning, we had indulged in a fake cultural phenomenon. Happily, blissfully unaware of the error of our ways, we had slammed Arnott's Chocolate Biscuits using the wrong hot drink. We were like Anglicans taking fake communion, moderate muslim women wearing pants, Hindus eating hamburger. We were heretics.

I welcomed the inquisition. I confessed my sins. I renounced my heretical ways.

I ordered a coffee. Carefully, I nipped the diagonally opposite corners off a delicate chocolate biscuit. I dipped it into the strong, black, unsweetened chinese brew. I drew the warm liquid in through the makeshift chocolate straw. Just as the bitter coffee hit my tongue, I shoved the rapidly softening cookie into my mouth.

Oh.

My.

God!

My friends, the truth was revealed to me that night. The everlasting truth that is the real path of the Tim-tam slam was delivered to me in a blast of mouth watering, soggy, bitter-sweet Arnott's Chocolate Biscuit. And I cannot keep this truth to myself. It fills me to overflowing. I must pass it on. Hear me now, friends. Get up off your couch. Get youself down to your local imported confectioner and buy a package of Tim-tams. Pick up a coffee at Dunkin Donuts on the way home - black, no sugar. And then, my friends, my children, my dear, dear children, and then... Slam those babies!

Hallelujah!

Six years of secret Santa hints

This will only be significant - or even comprehensible - to four or five of my dozen or so regular readers, but I wanted somewhere to put it so that I could link to it from elsewhere, so here it is.

Brightweavings.com secret santa sign-up/hints Q&A, 2003-2009:

2003

I prefer a more contemporary spelling system, so I'll just refer to our organizational elf as:
The Mail Man


1. What is your age range?

I don't want to be too specific, but I'm somewhere between 38 and 39.

2. Gender?

Maille(ok, so I'm not as clever as I like to think.)

3. Do you have a favorite color?

No. Colour is good.

4. Favorite authors/ type of book?

Fantasy/Science Fiction, but I'm picky.

5. What books have you really been wanting?

Can't think of one.

6. What type of music do you like?

Really picky here too. I only listen to Hard Rock, Rap, Classical, Jazz, Flamenco Guitar, Inuit Pop, Celtic, and South American Zydeco music.

7. What cds have you really been wanting?

Can't think of any of those, either. I'm kinda an impulse CD shopper.

8. What movies have you been wanting? (Specify DVD or VHS and region code)

Kinda thinkin' about The Nightmare Before Christmas (region 1)(widescreen only), but no nevermind.

9. What is your t-shirt size?

Large. Well, really medium, but you know how T-shirts go. Definitely not XL.

10. Do you collect anything? if so, what?

Antique cameras, just in case my secret Santa wins the lottery just before he/she shops for me.

11. What are some of your other hobbies?

Well, curling. Who'da thunk it? Um. BBQ. Sure, yeah, BBQ. And B&W photography.

12. Do you prefer gold-tone or silver-tone jewelry?

Platimun.

13. Do you have any food allergies or serious dislikes?

No food allergies. I really, really, really don't like today's crop of Saturday morning cartoons.

14. Anything else you think your Secret Santa should know?

The older I get, the more concerned I am with nose hair.


2004

1. what is your age range? without being too specific, approximately 39 years, 8 months.

2. gender? 19, 20, 21! Male.

3. Do you have a favorite color? No.

4. favorite authors/ type of book? Mostly science fiction. Big fan of Larry Niven, Frank Herbert, David Brin, Orson Scott Card...

5. what books have you really been wanting? Medea: Harlan's World.
Ringworld's Children or Scatterbrain by Larry Niven
Kiln People or Life Happens by David Brin

6. what type of music do you like? Almost every known form of music. Except country. And opera. I enjoy hearing traditional music from all over the world.

7. what cds have you really been wanting? Is the new Lee Aaron CD out yet? Why, yes it is.

8. What movies have you been wanting? (Specify format and region) I Still think the DVD (North American widescreen release) of A Nightmare Before Christmas would be cool.

9. what is your t-shirt size? Is there more than one? Large, I guess.

10. do you collect anything? if so, what? If I don't come up with a gift for my wife that beats what I sent to Daisyjane last year, I'll be collecting bad mojo for some time to come

11. what are some of your other hobbies? writing, watching TV, napping.

12. do you prefer gold-tone or silver-tone jewelry? my jewelry quota is currently filled.

13. please include anything else you feel is important that would help your secret santa know what you would like. I absolutely loved Clinton's inclusion of the concept of the 'mathom' last year.

Remember that "negative hints" such as allergies might also be helpful. I got nuthin'

Ho! Ho! Ho!


2005

1. What is your age? 40...ish

2. Male or Female? Male. At least I was when I filled out this survey last year. Don't think anything has changed.

3. Do you have a favourite color? Yes

4. Favourite authors/Type of book? Um...kinda obvious, no?

5. What books have you really been wanting? I've been looking to dive into Dunnett, but have not yet taken the plunge. Also, something in a skeptical vein might be interesting, like Sagan, or Dawkins.

6. What type of music do you like? I'm pretty much a huge music fan. The older I get, the less exclusive I become. If you like it, I'll likely like it.

7. What cd's have you really been wanting? A new Loreena McKennitt CD, but unless you can persuade her to start recording again, it's probably not gonna happen.

8. What movies have you been wanting? DVD(include region code) or VHS (NTSC or PAL) I'd love the Nightmare Before Christmas Special Edition DVD (NTSC, region 1)

9. What is your t-shirt size? L

10. Do you collect anything? If so, what? Antique cameras. Artwork is cool.

11. Do you collect things from other countries? There are other countries?

12. What are some of your other hobbies? Curling...I need a new hogs' hair push broom. Or a beer mug that says Scots do it with 44lb. rocks.

13. Do you prefer gold-tone or silver-tone jewelry? Gold

14. Please include anything else you feel is important that would help your Secret Santa know what you would like. I (heart) my dog. The cats I can take or leave. Also, mathoms rule!

15. Do you have any food allergies? Nothing has killed me so far, but something in Italy made me break out in spots. My wife thinks it was the peaches.

16. Full mailing address (Include real name)Has been sent to our seasonal elf.

17. What is your BW.com username? Um, isn't it at the top of the post? If it's too much trouble to scroll up to it, Robin_of_Lox.

Merry Christmas to come.


2006

1. What is your age range?
I am several months short of being "the answer."

2. Gender?
Male.

3. Do you have a favorite color?
Yes.

4. Favorite authors/ type of book?
Yes.

5. What books have you really been wanting?
I have recently thought I might like to do some reading on skeptical topics. Sagan or Dawkins come to mind.

6. What type of music do you like?
Music. Recently I've been enjoying folk and traditional music, but it's hard, really, to go wrong. Classical. Blues. Jazz. Good old fashioned Rock 'n' Roll.

7. What CDs have you really been wanting?
That new Sting album of Lute music sounds really cool. No, I'm not kidding. Also been eyeing Rachelle Van Zanten, Kelly Trottier, April Verch, and Eileen Laverty since seeing them all at the Ottawa folk festival.

8. What movies have you been wanting? What region DVDs can you view?
Region 1 (North America). Got a hurt on for the new Battlestar Galactica series, but that's a little bit too dear for this venue.

9. What is your t-shirt size?
Men's large. Medium in real clothes, but T-shirts are different.

10. Do you collect anything? if so, what?
Abusive letters from indignant astrologers and creationists. Antique cameras. Withering looks of scorn from my cat. You know, the normal things.

11. What are some of your other hobbies?
Curling. Golf. Poking astrologers and creationists.

12. Do you prefer gold-tone or silver-tone jewelry?
I have all the jewelry I'll ever wear.

13. Please include anything else you feel is important that would help your secret santa know what you would like.
In the sprit of this event, mathoms and hand made items are greatly appreciated. Things from where you are, or that represent what you are. It's the participation and interaction that count here, not the gift itself.


2007

What is your BW.com username? Robin_of_lox

What is your age range? 42-42

Gender? Male

Do you have a favorite color? Yes

Favorite authors/ type of book? SF/Fantasy. Right now I have a hankering for all things Scalzi (I already have Old Man's War). Also would love some Sagan (non-fiction), particularly The Demon-Haunted World: Science as a Candle in the Dark.

What books have you really been wanting? Oops, see above.

What type of music do you like? Music.

What CDs/music have you really been wanting? Any of the Johnny Cash "American Recordings" series.

What movies have you been wanting? What region DVDs can you view? Meh. Not so much.

What is your t-shirt size? M or L. Mostly L.

Do you collect anything? If so, what? Antique cameras. Extra pounds.

What are some of your other hobbies? Writing on my blog. Curling. Unappreciated acerbic wit.

Do you prefer gold-tone or silver-tone jewelry? Meh, not so much.

Do you have any food allergies or serious dislikes? No.

Please include anything else you feel is important that would help your Secret Santa know what you would like. Mathoms are good. Homemade stuff is good. Fun is good.


2008

What is your BW.com username? Robin_of_lox

What is your age range? I am no longer the answer.

Gender? In a binary world, I'd be a one, not a zero.

Do you have a favorite color? Yes.

Favorite authors/ type of book? SF/Fantasy (duh!) Recently reading skeptical and scientific non-fiction a bit. Got The God Delusion last year and enjoyed it.

What books have you really been wanting? The Demon Haunted World by Carl Sagan. John Scalzi's The Last Colony. Is it too early to start the new Thomas Covenant series?

What type of music do you like? Just about everything. No country.

What CDs/music have you really been wanting? Arc Angels, Haywire, and more recent, Haley Westenra, Rodrigo Y Gabriela, Georgie Auld, Armik. Just some artists I've written down while listening to Pandora.

What movies have you been wanting? What region DVDs can you view? Region 1, I believe (North America). Nothing specific on my want list here, but I'm open to suggestion.

What is your t-shirt size? L

Do you collect anything? If so, what? Antique Cameras, unapproving stares, waistline inches.

What are some of your other hobbies? Curling, picking on the credulous.

Do you prefer gold-tone or silver-tone jewelry? Don't really wear much.

Do you have any food allergies or serious dislikes? No. I'm an adventurous eater. No bugs.

Please include anything else you feel is important that would help your Secret Santa know what you would like. Mathoms are good. Really, it's the thought that counts.


2009

What is your BW.com username? Same as it ever was.

What is your age range? Fo-di-fo.

Gender? Maniscule

Do you have a favorite color? Blue - no Yellow - Aaaaaahhh!

Favorite authors/type of book? Haven't really been reading much lately.

What books have you really been wanting? Something by Carl Sagan or James Randi would be fun. Also, if you could contact Ricardo Pinto, and give him a smack upside the head and tell him to hurry up and finish the third book of The Stone Dance of the Chameleon series, that would be good.

What type of music do you like? Music. Like music much much lots. No country or opera. Pretty much anything else is fair game. Wait - if John Scalzi likes it I probably think it's stupid.

What CDs/music have you really been wanting? Nothing specific comes to mind right now. I'm open to trying new things.

What movies have you been wanting? What region DVDs can you view? Region 1 (North America). I got The Nightmare Before Christmas last year, so that's out.

What is your t-shirt size? L.

Do you collect anything? If so, what? Richmond Hill Curling Club Sinner's Brier commemorative mugs. Fat lips for my smart mouth. You know, stuff.

What are some of your other hobbies? Curling.

Do you prefer gold-tone or silver-tone jewelry? Not really a jewelry kind of guy.

Do you have any food allergies or serious dislikes? No. Well, OK, I'm pretty averse to homeopaths and astrologers.

Please include anything else you feel is important that would help your Secret Santa know what you would like. As in previous years, mathoms and regional items are fun. Homemade is cool. Stuff like that.

Ellipsis Monday Photo Shoot - Halloween Edition

In this week's Ellipsis Monday Photo Shoot, Carly invites us to post pictures based upon a Halloween theme. For extra credit, she says:

Show me a GHOST. A real one. A Fake one. Any old GHOST will do! Feel free to use your photo editing software if you like. The spookier the better! Scare me please!

Never having been one to be hung up on doing things in the right order, I chose to dive right into the extra credit question - mostly because it gave me a chance to dust off one of my old skeptical articles from the original Aurora Walking Vacation blog. Herewith, I am pleased to present a repost of a piece first published on Thursday, February 10, 2005. Boo!


SPIRIT PHOTOGRAPHY

  The other day on a message board I was accused of ridiculing somebody for my reply to their post offering spirit photography lessons. I wrote a fairly long and detailed reply offering up my expertise on the subject right there on the board, without people having to resort to taking some kind of formal lessons. Apparently, I stepped on somebody's toes, because my post was taken down by the powers that be in short order. A lesson learned. Far be it from me to impinge upon somebody's ability sell themselves and their 'talents' on AOL's message board system.

  Here, however, is an entirely different matter. In my personal journal, I can chose to make my expertise available to all for free if I so choose.

  I so choose. Herewith, find attached evidence of my mad spirit photography skillz. I have 'em. You can have 'em too. This entry shows the evidence. If there is interest, I will do another entry detailing my methods.

  An introductory note: All of the photographs in this entry are (with the exception of one) taken by me, and, other than some cropping and resizing for editorial purposes, unmanipulated. No photoshopping here. These are pictures of actual phenomena.

  First, let me introduce you to Matthew. Many of you, if you have been reading me for a while, have heard me mention his name. You may even have seen a picture or two of him here from time to time. Little known to us, Matthew has a guardian spirit who helps him with his homework. I have taken hundreds of pictures of Matthew before, and never before seen anything like this before. However, I had never before taken a picture of him doing homework before. Yesterday I did, and got this.



  It looks like, in this picture, there is a spirit of some kind hovering over Matt's head as he does his homework. In fact, if you look close enough you can see what looks like fingers reaching out to touch his head; almost as if some kind of otherworldly knowledge were being imparted to him. This may explain many of his teacher's comments regarding Matthew's homework assignments. Obviously, the answers he is providing are simply beyond her ability to comprehend.
  I enhanced the above photo with specialty software to reveal this:



  You can clearly see the otherworldly violet aura surrounding the spirit manifestation. It is in stark contrast to the more earthly colours of the rest of the photograph. You can even see that aura impacting on the hanging, potted plant in the background. I always wondered why that plant grew so well.

  A photograph taken a moment later reveals that this spirit falls into the famous spirit photography category of a vortex spirit. This appears to be a rare double vortex. Or a close up of the ghost's elbow, I'm not sure.



  One night I was in my basement, trying to take a picture of my cat. She didn't want to sit still for the picture, and was very restless. Later, when I looked at the pictures, I saw this:



  Look very carefully at the left hand side of the picture, and you will see the visible manifestation of spirit orbs. There are several to be seen in the picture, but the clearest one is right near the top of the frame. I have enlarged it to bring out more detail. You can clearly see a face, not unlike that of the man in the moon, on the close-up of this orb. These orbs are obviously ghosts. Due to the similarities in appearance, it is also quite clear that the moon is a ghost, too.
  I have hypothesized that these ghosts were attempting to protect my cat, when she did not want to have her picture taken by me. Due to my frequent sneezing at the time, I suspect that these were the ghosts of cats, thereby causing my allergies to flare up. On a related note, we have been erroneous in using the terminology 'the man in the moon' all these years. We should have been saying, 'the cat in the moon.'

  I was outside the other night, and happened, entirely by accident, to take a picture of the tree in my front yard. When I looked at the picture later I was amazed by the amazing colours of the colourful lights I saw.



  Look at the colourful illumination of the snow on both sides of the street. And the colourful lights in the background, behind the tree. None of these colourful lights was colourful like those colours to my eye. Obviously, the spirit world is at work here. There must be many ghosts of painters around the Aurora area.



  Look how the lights in this close up appear to be dancing around the telephone pole. In colours.

 What AWV entry would be complete without a picture of the redoubtable Shadow? Here he is with a piece of garden edging in his mouth. Somehow, he managed to tear this up out of ground that was frozen solid during our -30 degree cold snap a couple of weeks ago. It was originally about twenty five feet long. This is what is left. As you can see, of any member of our family, Shadow attracts more spirit attention than any other. They are drawn to the young, and cute.
  This picture shows Shadow surrounded by ghostly orbs. There are dozens of them in view, maybe hundreds, and remarkably, every single one of them unique. Not a one exactly like any other. (It's because they used to be people, and people are all different).



  Finally, here are two astounding pictures of spirit phenomena. I have saved the best for last. I have elected to link to the pictures rather than post them here so I could show them at a larger size, the better to view fine details. The first example is a picture I took in my back yard one January evening. I was standing there, doing nothing, minding my own business, with a digital camera in my hand, when I inexplicably started feeling cold. I suspected there was a spirit, or ghost nearby. Breathing heavily with fear, and fear, I raised the camera and snapped a few frames.  The first picture is here: http://members.aol.com/plittle/ghostface.jpg . In this picture, one can see the bio-thermal pulmono-exhalatory cloud as it coalesces. If you look very carefully, you can just make out the outlines of a face.
  The second picture was taken a moment later, but still slightly too early. The carbondioxygenic vapourous apparition had not yet fully formed. Yet, the image is unmistakable. It is still quite fuzzy, but you can clearly see that this is the spirit of a young woman wearing a hat. http://members.aol.com/plittle/ghostface2.jpg .
  I am left to wonder; who was this woman? When did she walk this earth? What is she doing in my back yard?

  I would like to close this topic with a short statement. We at Aurora Walking Vacation are on a quest for the truth, and are interested in an open minded examination of these phenomena. We invite all discussion, as long as it agrees with our views. Be advised that anyone who suggests there are rational, scientific explanations for our results will find their closed-minded comments immediately deleted, and their rude, harassing asses banned from making subsequent comments. Furthermore, we may complain about them on the message board and threaten to report them to AOL, the police, the F.B.I., and our Alien Overlords. Remember, open minded means, "in agreement with my point of view."

A few notes:

1) This post is made in memory of Lahoma Taylor, A.K.A. MzGoochi, who was alive when that last picture was taken, but was subsequently taken from us by cancer.

2) I left the text form of the last two links as they were. However, AOL Hometown, and the members.aol.com domain no longer exist, and the photographs are now hosted on my Flickr account.

3) If you like, you can visit the archived version of this article at http://awvarchive.blogspot.com/2005/02/spirit-photography.html. Some of the comments are interesting.

4) Happy Halloween.

Lime and limpid green, a second scene.

And now we present several species of small furry animals gathered together in a cave and grooving with a pict.

I'm a little farklempt. Talk amongst yourselves. I'll give you a topic: there is no dark side of the Moon really ... as a matter of fact it's all dark. Discuss.

My new favourite skeptical quotation...

I have a text file full of quotations I like. I have picked them up here and there over several years of internet surfing. Most of them, as you might imagine, are of a skeptical nature. There are well over a hundred of them, so far. Maybe as many as a hundred and fifty. I use them as Facebook status updates every few days, you know - just to piss people off.

Today I added a new favourite to the file, from comic artist Wiley Miller, who writes the well know Non Sequitur comic. In Monday's comic this week, he writes, ""Stupid is a condition. Ingnorance is a choice." Click through to see the context. So true, in so many different ways.

I'm off to update my Facebook status.

Today's Headlines

Sources are reporting the death of an unidentified 50 year old man due to heart failure. His friends and family say he was taken before his time.

In unrelated news, hundreds of young men in their late twenties and early thirties are celebrating their sudden release from decades old non-disclosure agreements...

Isn't her fifteen minutes up yet?

It is completely beyond me why anyone is still talking about the whole Letterman-Palin joke issue. I can't imagine why Dave felt it necessary to issue a public apology, much less two. I mean, Sarah, really. When you join the American political process at such a high level, you become a target for these guys. When you involve your family in as public a manner as you did, you become a wider target. When you demonstrate, by word and by deed, that you are hopelessly out of touch with the real world, that you are, effectively, a moron, you become an easy target. When you demonstrate, by word and by deed, that you are a hypocrite, you become a juicy target. When you moan and whine about it, you become...well, quite frankly, you become a bit pathetic. And when you make the mistake of thinking that everything is about you, it just becomes a little bit sad. Because, let's be honest, Sarah. You and your family were convenient comedic accessories, but that joke was aimed at Alex Rodriguez. And you don't hear him crying about it, do you?